"Leisurely" Walkers

What I don't understand are "leisurely" walkers. Allow me to explain...

When I am stuck behind a cloud-gazer in the ten minutes I have to jet from the West Center to Thurmond, I can't help but think, "don't they have somewhere to be?"

I am a firm believer in using my time efficiently. There are only 24 hours in a day, in which the majority of us are given an equal opportunity to maximize our productivity. One of the best solutions I have found to minimize wasted time is to quicken my step.

Walking is one activity that can be done at practically any point during the day (and at night as well, if you're willing to carry a can of mase and a steak knife), so why waste the time walking to class when you could be putting your efforts toward something more beneficial? Like, oh I don't know, studying perhaps?

Granted, there are certain circumstances where walking at a rate of negative 2 mph is acceptable, but to and from class is not (and should not) be one of them. And if you are a slow walker by nature, or just feel the need to pause and admire the new shingles on Tillman, take a step to your right (the slow lane) and let us speedy strollers pass on by. Is that too much to ask? I sure hope not, my friend.

Just to help out all those slow walkers out there, I have provided a brief list of circumstances in which walking slow is the norm:

1. Admiring the vastness of Winthrop Lake
2. Through an empty, abandoned field where no one will be stuck behind you on the sidewalk
3. In the comfort of your own residence hall/living room
4. Alongside a small child/person with exceptionally short legs
5. I'm out of ideas.

So next time you're tempted to stop and smell the roses, by all means go ahead. Just make sure to check behind you for the girl with curly hair, and a purple bookbag feverishly memorizing her stack of flashcards. She'd very much appreciate it :)